By Chris Bavender
“I learned long ago there is no arguing with someone with Alzheimer’s. There is no bringing them back to reality.”
For Molly Godby of Zionsville, her reality is a mother who is in the later stages of the disease. A mother who was diagnosed in 2007 at the age of 66. A mother who – more often than not – doesn’t even know who Godby is.
“Her physical health is a lot better than her mental health. She can rarely put full sentences together,” the 39-year-old Godby said. “She does not process the meaning behind a lot of words. If someone says, ‘Lee, this is your daughter,’ she no longer knows what daughter means.”
To help cope with the emotional ups and downs, Godby blogs about her journey caring for her 73-year-old mother, Lee Adams.
“A lot of people still don’t understand what Alzheimer’s is all about and what happened to the person,” Godby said. “I have been brutally honest about what is happening with my mom and my feelings about it. People have thanked me – I’ve gotten phone calls from strangers who said they wanted to thank me. I think it just resonates with people.”
So, when Godby heard Chicken Soup for the Soul was looking for submissions for its new book, Living with Alzheimer’s & Other Dementias, she knew she wanted to share her mother’s story. She sent in four essays, including one titled, “The Lady in the Mirror.”
“It’s basically about how Mom looks in the mirror and thinks her reflection is someone else but this person she sees she says is kind and beautiful and her best friend,” Godby said.
In January, she learned “The Lady in the Mirror” would be one of 101 essays published in the book.
“It means a lot. My mom – from the beginning – has accepted this whole thing with as much grace as you can imagine. She let go of her independence when needed and never minded if people asked questions about Alzheimer’s because she wanted people to learn about it,” Godby said. “Our parents constantly teach us lessons and you would think that having Alzheimer’s she could not teach me lessons anymore but she still is but in a very different way.”
Lessons Godby shares in her essay.
“We all should love the man or woman, boy or girl we see in the mirror. We should love ourselves with the kind of love my mom has for her lady in the mirror, even though she doesn’t know she is seeing herself, my beautiful, loving, and kind Mom.”
Godby will have a book signing from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. May 17 at Black Dog Books in Zionsville. Profits from sales of the book that day will go to the local Alzheimer’s Association, while the national Alzheimer’s organization will receive all the royalties from Chicken Soup for the Soul: Living with Alzheimer’s & Other Dementias.
Godby’s blog about her experiences caring for her mother is available at www.abundantlyawesome.blogspot.com.
