Kids really do say the darndest things


Out of the mouths of babes come the darndest things. We all know that. We’ve all been there. Just the other day I was talking to my husband about some friends of ours who were at that very moment in labor with their first babies. (Yes, plural, as in twin boys.)  I recalled the morning Mr. Prego called to tell me the news: “Twins mother-f*%#er!” he sang the minute I answered the phone. No “hi” or “hello,” just a joyful chorus of cursing.

As I’m laughing with Doo about the story, I hear, with perfect emotion, inflection and pitch, my 6-year old daughter belt out, “Twins –f*%#er!” Huh. I hadn’t realized she was in the kitchen. Now she’ll probably repeat it at school or, worse, her Religious Ed class. Sorry, Father!

Later that day, my little potty mouth asks, “Will the Prego’s babies have brown skin?” Granted, this seems like an odd question, until you know that my children have twin cousins who were adopted from Ethiopia and do in fact have very brown skin. So actually, this is a rather astute observation from a first grader. (She’s gifted.) I go on to explain that no, because Mr. and Mrs. Prego have white skin, their boys will most likely have white skin too. She’s satisfied and scampers off on her merry, innocent way.

The next morning, as I’m updating the kids on the progress of the Prego’s labor, which is turning in to a marathon event, my 9-year old son says, “I really hope Ms. Prego has her twins today.  She’s been wanting a baby for so long. It’ll be a dream come true for her.” Gulp. Tear. How sweet was that? The Pregos have been waiting a long time for kids; four years of infertility and various treatments. And this is, most definitely, a dream come true for them. But hearing a comment like that out of a boy who occasionally picks his nose and often pushes me to the brink of crazy made me both reorder our kid rankings with him at the top and remember just how wise and observant children can be.

Yes, kids say the darndest things. Some funny, some suprising, and some just downright adult-like. Of course, I think the Pregos would say that the best thing to hear out of the mouths of babes is those first healthy cries in the delivery room. (The Pregos did eventually have their twin boys, by the way, after a very long and difficult labor, just one day shy of Thanksgiving.)  I agree, but secretly I can’t wait to hear the things that come out of those two little boys in a couple of years.  Twins mother-f*%#er! Peace out.


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