Commentary by Heather Kestian
Recently, I was in a store with my smallest one in tow. He was a little upset, since he was hungry, and I was frantically looking for what I needed. The layout of the store was a bit confusing and I could not figure out where this special lotion was located: in the baby aisle or the lotion aisle? I initially choose the lotion aisle. Well, I paid dearly for my poor decision making skills. A dear woman in the aisle, sensing my annoyance with this product location, tells me that I will miss these days. Thank goodness for her kindness, as there was a chance his shrieks were going to damage her hearing.
She thinks I will miss this. This. She has lost her mind.
As the week progressed, I decided to reflect upon her lesson for me. Running a household of boys, I told myself there were more things I would miss. You be the Judge and tell me I will miss these things:
Mulch in my house. How does one get bucket loads of mulch in shoes? Do you take your shoes off, scoop it up and put your shoes back on? I finally decided to ask my kid how this comes to pass? His answer: I have a hole in my shoe.
Having to do laundry four days a week. How do small people – all three of them combined weigh half of what I weigh – require laundry three times as often? I will never understand the mechanics of this.
Lastly, tell me I will miss buying stock in Kleenex because the investment in the products we have to buy for their runny noses should be paying me dividends. Again, we are talking about tiny humans, but they have outstanding snot production capabilities.
Tell me again, please, I will miss this. Right?
