By Chris Bavender
It started with issues at work. Information missing in reports. Struggles to learn new tasks that used to come so easily. Moments of forgetfulness.
Roger Chamberlain and his wife thought he might be having issues from pre-existing liver disease. But a trip to the doctor led to a devastating diagnosis – early onset Alzheimer’s. It was 2012 and Roger was just 58.
“We were told he has dementia and his brain had shrunk to the size of an 85-year-old man,” Sheryl Chamberlain said.
The diagnosis drastically changed their lives – “emotionally, physically and financially.”
“My support person is now lost. He communicates very little. Has gone from an extremely extroverted individual to one who rarely speaks and mostly only when spoken to,” Sheryl said. “He worked a part time job at first thinking he could do that to feel worthwhile and bring in a little income. He was passing out samples at Marsh Supermarkets and Super Target.”
Roger is at what is considered the middle stage.
“Some days are clearer than others but most days present some confusion at one point or another,” Sheryl said. “He gets frustrated when I ask him to do something simple like turn off a light, put on your socks, etc. and he doesn’t understand what he is to do. There have been times when we were looking at family photos and I asked who some of the individuals were and he was calling everyone our grandson’s name or our daughter’s step daughter’s name. I just never know from one moment to the next what to expect and what he does or does not understand.
Concern over leaving Roger at home while she was at work led Sheryl to place him at Joy’s House – Adult Day Services.
“I was very stressed leaving him at home while I was working eight hours a day. Taking him to Joy’s House has relieved me of that stress,” she said. “I started with two days a week and he really enjoyed going there so I extended to three days. Mid November I realized he did not know how to use the telephone (land line or cell) so I had to move him to five days a week.”
The diagnosis not only has impacted the couple financially but in other ways.
“We used to travel a fair amount. Now he is too fidgety and stressed sometimes traveling in the car for very long,” Sheryl said. “We had big plans of traveling; an Alaskan cruise was on our bucket list. That is off the list as he could not travel that far. We do go out for dinner occasionally but those aren’t as entertaining as they used to be since there is next to no conversation. We enjoy the food but without conversation and his former sense of humor, the fun is missing.”
For Sheryl, life closely mirrors that of the recent movie, ‘Still Alice,’ starring Julianne Moore (who nabbed an Oscar for this role), which details the struggles of Moore’s character who is diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. But, Sheryl has no plans to see the movie.
“I feel I am living the movie and could not handle seeing it on the ‘Big Screen,’” she said. “Most likely I would cry the entire time. I don’t need a movie to make me cry. I am too emotional at times as it is.”
But, she is happy about the growing focus on the disease.
“This is needed. With more awareness that brings more focus on the need for more research and supporting those affected. We need to find a cure – a way to actually slow down the progression for those with it, a cure for the next generation with our children and prevention for even our grandson’s generation,” she said. “Sadly, what has helped is some well known individuals have been affected by this wicked disease and they have been openly talking about it. It is no longer just for ‘old’ people. Under 65-year-olds are being hit with it too. People are learning this can’t be swept under the carpet and hidden.
