A baby comes into the world as a pure soul with no layers. For example, they don’t have any mind chatter or inner self-talk telling them they should or shouldn’t do or say something. They don’t have thoughts telling them they are not worthy or good enough.

We are all born pure souls and then we become layered with our life experiences and messages we have received from our caregivers, families, friends, peers, school, co-workers, bosses and so on. If we have any traumatic experiences, it can reshape how we think, feel and see ourselves.

When we begin to de-layer our negative self-talk and move through the pain of the past, we experience freedom, peace and happiness. We become more of who we are at the core.

1. List 10 words to describe you. Think back to when you were a little boy or girl. What were you like? What did you like to do? What brought the most joy to your life?

2. Write a time line of life events. Start from your earliest childhood memories. What are the most impactful experiences or events in your life, both positive and more difficult memories? How did they shape who you are? What did you learn from them? How did that shape who you are?

3. Let go of secrets. Whatever is most difficult for you to talk about, may be most important for your healing. Find someone safe or a professional to work through these feelings or memories that you might not have been allowed to talk about. Shame and guilt can keep us from living in the present. It keeps us stuck. We might not realize this is where it comes from until we unlock what has been buried so deep. Freedom comes when we no longer hold onto the past. This step is essential because it covers up who we are and how we show up in relationships.

4. Begin to look within. When we understand ourselves, we are empowered to not live by what others think or by our past. Notice how you feel and trust yourself to make decisions that are best for you. When we speak our truth and communicate how we feel without expectations in return, we begin to connect to who we are. We remove the layers and blocks that no longer serve us.

You are worthy and meant to be here for a purpose. When we remove the layers, we see clearly who we were created to be.